Friday, January 28, 2011

A Happy Marriage Wanted By Everyone

A happy marriage is a new beginning of life, a new starting point for happiness and usefulness.
Allow God into your relationship - He's the one who holds the key to a happy marriage.
Make time for each other: time to listen, time to talk, time to just be together. Play and work as a couple. A very simple secret to a happy marriage is to remember to spend quality time alone together. A long lasting, happy marriage is about knowing your partner, being supportive, and being nice. A happy marriage is based on friendship, knowing each other well, having mutual respect at all times, whether you are alone or among others, and knowing when it makes sense to try to work out an issue when it is not solvable.
Time for friends is also crucial. Once every other week, you should both take one day or evening to spend time apart and with same-sex friends. This will help you maintain your identity and appreciate the time you have with your spouse.
Communication is one of the most important keys to any successful marriage. Before marriage, couples often find themselves talking alot - but this soon diminishes after the wedding day. Communication must continue throughout the marriage. The couple must continue to learn from one another, taking time to share their thoughts, feelings and dreams. That means talking through situations rather than bottling up or yelling. By showing respect, you can work and play together as a couple should. With this, the two of you can talk to understand the other person's side better.
Accept the flaws in your spouse. Since no one is perfect, you want to learn to appreciate the differences between the two of you. However, healthy arguments are good for a relationship, hence; the most important thing would be learning how to compromise with one another.
Learn to ignore the small stuff. Every marriage faces challenges, some big and some small. Remind yourself that life is precious and short. Therefore, focus on the larger battles, working through them as a team while letting go of things that do not matter. Make sure you choose your battles wisely. If you are going to pick something apart, make sure it really matters.
After an argument, take time to cool down before you kiss and make up.
As social creatures, we need companionship, and no less so in a union between husband and wife. Whenever there is an argument or you want to correct your spouse, ask yourself, "Do I want to be right or do I want to be happy?"
Be forgiving with your partner. You will be faced with tough times and you have a choice of forgiving him or her when a mistake happens or carrying it in the marriage. One of the main components of a happy marriage is that both spouses are able to forgive, that they do not hold grudges or act judgmental towards each other. Obviously, if you do not forgive, the marriage will suffer. Therefore, if resolution is found, swallow your pride and forgive your mate, letting the new day be another beginning. True, building a lasting, happy marriage is not easy, but it is certainly possible.
Never take your spouse for granted. Again, life is too precious. Instead, find things that your partner does well or things that please you and let him or her know. Let everyone else know too.
Another secret to a happy marriage is selflessness, putting the needs of your spouse ahead of your own needs, helping each other in little ways. The key to a happy marriage is caring more for the other person more than you do for yourself. You need genuine caring, honesty, and respectful feelings for each other. You have to have open, honest and consistent communication for a happy marriage.
Date. Just because you are now legally married, you should not stop dating. Every Friday or Saturday night, even if you have children, make a date. This could be something as simple as bowling and beer or a romantic dinner and concert. The date can even be inside your home. You don't have to go anywhere fancy to have it. The activity is not important, just that you get time for just the two of you.
Share common goals and values. Work as a team to achieve them. Push and pull for the same basic things in your life. When husband and wife regularly support each other in their goals and when they show honor and respect for each other, their marriage is kept strong. The stability of marriage depends largely upon the way the husband and the wife fulfill their respective roles. Both persons need to remember that no matter how bleak things seem, it is possible for many marriages to get back on course, but both husband and wife should be willing to cooperate.
Keep intimacy as part of the marriage. Remember, this is the person you love, the one you want to share your life with, which means letting go of inhibitions. Intimacy is an excellent way to stay close, doing wonders for a marriage. Intimacy between married people is very important and touching is a means of communication that reflects closeness, connection and love; it is your way of keeping the spark alive. Start and end each day with a kiss and hug.

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